As far as I can tell, mobile technology is the most invasive phenomenon ever to hit the human race. It has invaded the workplace, invaded socials, invaded media, invaded health, invaded education, invaded technology as a whole, and is showing no signs of slowing down. I can repeat the above statement, replacing the word “invaded” with “disrupted” as well and I wouldn’t have said anything wrong.
Mobile technology is is the most invasive and disruptive phenomenon ever seen by humanity. It has changed everything, and continues to. I responded to a tweet this morning, as embedded below:
— Mister Mo® (@Mister_Mobility) October 9, 2012
It is a humorous thing to contemplate, but here is the picture of an individual in bed with two phones and a tablet. Someone chips in, “Our love lives are crying out”. Mobile has invaded and disrupted our love lives too.
I can make arguments for how mobile technology can spice up your love life. That isn’t difficult for me. But then I wanted to focus a bit on how mobile technology is disrupting relationships. Here is an example, in response to the above tweet:
— Soji Ayoade (@sojitweets) October 9, 2012
I can identify with that. My wife and I banter at times and she says, “If I had known that you loved mobiles like this, I wouldn’t have married you.” While it has never caused serious issues between us, and while it is said in jest, the message is in there: My love affair with mobile technology is an issue. I am learning to strike a good balance, and make sure that there are times that I put my phone aside (even switch it off) to give my wife due attention.
It isn’t just a male thing either. I know ladies who are almost always glued to their smartphones.
The Cinemas & Socials
I enjoy great movies. I watch a lot of them in the privacy of my home, but nothing beats the excitement of a big screen, the acoustics, and the fellowship of a movie theatre. As such, you will often find me at the cinema to see one blockbuster or the other. Usually, I go with a friend or two, and we make it a point to enjoy the movies TOGETHER. Yes; following the movie together, screaming together, laughing together and all that are part of what makes the experience special. But here is my observation: many times, a young man and a (his?) lady would walk in to see a movie, but all through the flick, she is on her BlackBerry. From start to finish, she is “pinging”.
At restaurants, I see the same thing happening: one person, and at times both, are hooked to their phones while out for a meal or to hang out. Why did they bother?
Attention Is Everything (Almost)
I don’t understand how two people can decide that they want to make out time to be together yet give themselves little or no attention. When you make out time for your partner, do put that phone aside for that period. Ignore calls and messages. If possible, put it in Silent Mode, and give him/her your attention.
How can you miss out on the magic of looking into the eyes of your loved one? How can anyone take out time to get away from their daily grind with a loved one and let themselves get distracted from the pleasures of really talking and sharing those snuggles, cuddles, and smooches?
Make no mistake about it: attention is key in ANY relationship. It isn’t quite everything, but once attention fades, the relationship is dead. Quote me.
I don’t mean to be crude, but at the rate things are going, we might soon have people with phone in hand while romping, and updating their status real-time with something like, “Ooooh, baby!”
It would probably feel cool in today’s super-connected yet disjointed world of social media, but that individual would be missing out on the intimacy and the special warmth that time alone should provide.